First of all, I hate this so much. Second of all, imagine if the two switched places.
(Veruca falls into the trash chute) Chorus: Pray thou no more; for mortals have no escape from destined woe. Wisdom is the supreme part of happiness; and reverence towards the gods must be inviolate. Great words of prideful men are ever punished with great blows…
(Oedipus stabs his eyes out) Oompa Loompas: Oompa loompa doopity do I’ve got another riddle for you What do you get when you sleep with your mum? A curse on your kids for decades to come~
1) this is hysterical and 2) think about the eons of culture that have lead to the creation of this joke. I am humbled by this.
ok SO john mulaney has a new live show on the netflicks (the comeback kid) and i was lucky enough to see him do this act live in milwaukee this summer!!! but the recorded show is missing something special
so summer in milwaukee is known for being like. comically humid. disgustingly, oppressively humid. ‘can’t tell the difference between being downtown and being literally submerged in lake michigan’ humid
and poor john mulaney was wearing a nice-looking but also very warm suit. so once about every 10-20 minutes he would pause whatever spiel he was on, wipe his forehead, flutter his jacket about, regret his fashion choices and ask what was wrong with us that we don’t properly air condition our venues
about halfway through the show, a woman in one of the front rows stood up and started to walk out so in classic mulaney fashion he razzed her that she couldn’t take the heat either and asked her to bring him a pepsi – she didn’t break stride (i would try to play it cool too if over a thousand people were suddenly watching me get razzed by mulaney)
as soon as she was out of the theatre, he turned his mic off and started yelling to those of us who were still in there
“okay guys, we’re going to play a little prank on her! can everyone hear me? WE’RE GOING TO PLAY A PRANK! at some point later in the show i’m going to say ‘you know what they say in milwaukee!!’ and you’re all going to wave your arm around like this’ – he jauntily waved his arm with his first finger outstretched, like an 80 year old man doing the charleston – ‘and you will all shout ‘gimme some PANcakes!!!’’
we did a few rehearsals of this until he was satisfied, and he turned his mic back on and continued with his act
a few minutes later the woman walked back through the theatre but passed her row, walked all the way up to the stage, and set a can of pepsi at mulaney’s feet. he stopped, mouth agape for a moment and touched his chest. ‘is this really for me?’ he asked. ‘did i ask you for pepsi? i have no idea why i would do that, i hate pepsi.’ he thanked her sincerely several times, and when she turned his back to him to return to her seat, he made frantic ‘kill’ motions across his throat to signal to us that the prank was off
he continued to lament the heat for the rest of his act, eventually lost the jacket and drank the gifted pepsi, grimacing cartoonishly every time. at the very end of the night he thanked us for being a great audience, thanked the woman in particular for her kindness, and triumphantly said ‘BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY IN MILWAUKEE!!!’ and 1 very generous women was hopelessly confused when 1299 people shouted ‘GIMME SOME PANCAKES!!!!!’
if john mulaney was gay he’d be an almost perfect comedian. in the better timeline john mulaney is gay
the amount of people responding to this surprised he isnt gay only further proves this timeline isnt the right one and god made a big mistake
“I have a girlfriend now, uh, myself, which is weird because I’m probably gay based on the way I act and behave and have walked and talked for 28 years. I think I was supposed to be gay. I think, like, in Heaven they built, like, three quarters of a gay person and then they forgot to flip the final switch, and they just sent me out and it was like, “You marked that one gay, right?” and it was like, “Oh no! Was I supposed to?” and they were like, “Oh man, well this’ll be a very interesting person. This’ll be a very silly person.”” – John Mulaney, New In Town
326 Miles 